Posts Tagged ‘Yolanda Adams’

Facing and overcoming disappointment in 2011–Part 2

January 22, 2011

In searching for a definition of disappointment, I “happened upon” a most insightful discussion of the term in a motivational article in Nazareth on line by Dr. Francis, a pastor who states, “Disappointment is often defined as a feeling of dissatisfaction that results when your expectations are not realized; it’s a deep emotion felt when a strongly held expectation is not met or proved to be wrong.”

Disappointment occurs when our expectations are not met as we thought they would be.

Disappointment is one of three toxic emotions, a potentially deadly triumvirate of Disappointment–Discouragement—Despair. These three dangerous emotions, if unchecked or not countered, can precipitate a most destructive downward spiral that can sabotage the destiny of a believer. Once again, we must neutralize disappointment with expectations according to the Word of God. We look to Our Great God with “Great Expectations” which is much more than a novel by Dickens.

First of all, we must remember this:

Numbers 23:19

God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said,and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good? [KJV]

Proverbs 23:18 reminds us:

For surely there is a latter end [a future and a reward], and your hope and expectation shall not be cut off.  [AMP]

Jeremiah 29:11 also informs us of God’s concern for our future or “final outcome”:
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. [NKJV]             

The Amplified Bible expresses this truth this way:

 For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome. [AMP]

 The Psalmist reiterates that our hope and expectations are in God, not in our circumstances, not in what we have or do not have:

Psalm 39:7

And now, Lord, what do I wait for and expect? My hope and expectation are in You. [AMP] 

Psalm 62:5

My soul, wait only upon God and silently submit to Him; for my hope and expectation are from Him. [AMP]

Dr. Martin Luther, Jr. also reminds us of the proper attitude we should have toward disappointment which I characterize as the first of the “Deadly Ds”:

The statement by Dr. King expresses a profound truth regarding the difference between disappointment and hope.

As believers, we “silently submit to God”—not with wailing and bemoaning, not criticizing, not condemning nor complaining. We submit ourselves under the mighty hand of God and resist the Devil, who tries to convince us that God disappoints us and never fulfills His promises. We draw close to God and He draws close to us (James 4:7-8) 

So often we are plagued by disappointment when we pray, and God does not answer our prayers in the way that we think that He should. I once heard an account of a woman who prayed and was blessed in a most unusual and unexpected way. A statement was made at the end of her story regarding three possible responses to our prayer requests, which inspired this poem which includes the quotation: Sometimes we pray and find that the answer is “yes.” Other times we find that the answer is “not yet.” Or God may say, “I have something better in mind.”

So often we are plagued by disappointment when we pray, and God does not answer our prayers in the way that we think that He should. I once heard an account of a woman who prayed and was blessed in a most unusual and unexpected way. A statement was made at the end of her story regarding three possible responses to our prayer requests, which inspired this poem which includes the quotation: Sometimes we pray and find that the answer is “yes.” Other times we find that the answer is “not yet.”Or God may say, “I have something better in mind.”
                           We Pray—God Answers

 Wherefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray,

  believe that you receive them, and you will have them.

 Mark 11:24 

 

                                                                                        

 We pray, asking to receive and seeking to find.

 If we knock, the door shall be opened all our days,

 For God answers prayer in one of three sovereign ways:

 Sometimes we pray and find that the answer is “yes.”

 In Christ each promise is “yes” and “amen”,

 For God is not a man that He should lie.

 He has already spoken—What shall we say then

 But give thanks, for when we call Him, He hears each cry.

 Other times we find that the answer is “not yet.”

  We need more patience so that after we have done

  All the will of God, as sons we might be instilled

  With confident assurance given to each one,

  Set as an empty vessel, yet to be fulfilled.

  Or God may say, “I have something better in mind.”

  Before we abandon hope, feeling left behind,

  Though it may seem we cannot pass another test,

  But if we stop and think a moment, we will find

 God, our all-wise Father, really knows what is best.   

In part of a stanza from “Stone upon Stone: A Psalm of Remembrance” I describe a place where “disappointments and stillborn dreams lie at my feet,/wet with red, splattered with blood of miscarried sons.” I recognize that past disappointments and failures are many times difficult and seemingly impossible to get over.

But then I happened to think of a statement made by Dr. Dale Sides, who led a workshop in Columbus, and offered this candid advice for those who had been wounded by traumatic circumstances and devastating disappointments of the past:“Get a life; get a verse,  and get over it!” 

As I continued to work on this blog,reflecting on his remarks, I smiled and modified Dr. Side’s comment to say “Get a life; get a ‘life verse’ and get on with it!” For me, my “life verse” has been Romans 8:28:

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

As I face the rising sun of a new day begun, I must move forward and forget the past, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forth unto those things which are ahead, I must press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

I must place all my past disappointments and failures on the altar. During such times often I think of a song from my childhood days and way beyond which asks, “Is Your All on the Altar?” Here is a very moving rendition by Yolanda Adams:

        

Edith Lillian Young has found a simple way of countering disappointment simply by making a small change which can result in a big change in our attitude toward this particular “Deadly D.”

Disappointment

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Change one letter, then I see
That the thwarting of my purpose
Is God’s better choice for me.
His appointment must be a blessing,
Though it may come in disguise,
For the end from the beginning
Open to His wisdom lies.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Whose? The Lord, who loves me best,
Understands and knows me fully,
Who my faith and love would test;
For, like a loving earthly parent,
He rejoices when He knows
That His child accepts, unquestioned,
All that from His wisdom flows.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
“No good thing will He withhold,”
From denials oft we gather
Treasures of His love untold,
Well He knows each broken purpose
Leads to fuller, deeper trust,
And the end of all His dealings
Proves our God is wise and just.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Lord, I take it, then, as such.
Like the clay in hands of potter,
Yielding wholly to Thy touch.
All my life’s plan is Thy moulding,
Not one single choice be mine;
Let me answer, unrepining –
“Father, not my will, but Thine.”

If we truly believe that the Lord, our God, is good and that His mercy endures forever, and if we know that He always keeps His promise, and that as a good Father, He knows what is best for us, then we will release any disappointments we may have experienced and hold fast to His goodness and mercy which follow us all the days of our lives. Eliza Tabor offers this perspective of some of the positive effects that this seemingly negative emotion can have. “Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is to burning metal; it strengthens, tempers, intensifies, but never destroys it.”