Disappointment: a deadly emotion we cannot ignore

As the devastating effects of the Coronavirus Pandemic and other events continue to unfold, I recall a conversation I had some years ago with a fellow-believer where we commented on the word “disappointment” and how it can impact our lives. I posted a blog entry discussing the subject, and I am revising and re-posting it here:

Disappointment is a deadly emotion that we cannot ignore. If unchecked or not countered, it precipitates a most destructive downward spiral that can sabotage the destiny of a believer. We must continually look to God and to what He has promised in His Word when we encounter this potentially devastating emotion. As we do this, we recognize that God does not disappoint nor fail to fulfill the hopes or expectations of His children. No, He does not prevent hopes or expectations from being realized, which is how many define the verb to “disappoint.” One is said to feel “disappointed” or sad or displeased when one’s hopes or expectations have not been fulfilled. However, there is never any disappointment with God who does everything on purpose: As for God, His way is perfect.

As believers, we cannot hold onto any feelings of being disappointed! In reality, feelings of disappointment consist of our hopes and expectations. Disappointments come when God does not come through at the time that we “expect” nor in the way we “expect.” Disappointment is the result of “failed expectations” on our part.

The late Kim Clement spoke of the “power of presuppositions.” The term relates to assumptions or preconceived ideas as we speculate on a situation and how we think it should unfold. He went on to say that “Presupposition” is an enemy to destiny. . . .” We may sense that God has failed us when our lives fail to unfold according to our prescribed patterns and plans, as expressed in this poem inspired by the statement from Clement:

Presupposition: Enemy to Destiny

“Known to God from eternity are all His works.”

Acts 15:18

“Presupposition is an enemy to destiny. . . .”

Kim Clement

Prophetic words that God desires to bring to pass
Wither as un-ripened fruit that fails to mature,
As our lives seem to diminish from gold to brass
In the midst of changing times, of this we must be sure:
“Presupposition is an enemy to destiny.”
Our failed expectations shipwreck us and distort
Our view of the place where we thought that we would be,
As we accept what appears to be the last resort.
Though this downward spiral plummets to depths of despair,
We trust our all-wise Father who makes no mistakes,
For God heals broken lives that seem beyond repair
With exquisite beauty that fills all that He makes.
Known to God are all His works from eternity:
His perfect will unfolds to those with eyes to see.

When we think about it, however, there is no failure in God, for God is good, and because God is good, the Verse of the Day for March 13, 2021, a verse for every day of the year, reminds us of this truth:

Romans 8:28 (AMP):

We are assured and know that [God being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose.

We “silently submit to God”—not with wailing and bemoaning, not criticizing, not condemning nor complaining. We submit ourselves under the mighty hand of God and resist the Devil, who tries to convince us that God disappoints us and never fulfills His promises.

To counter the corrosive nature of being “disappointed” let’s take a look at the Word of God where we find that those who trust in God will not be disappointed.

Throughout the Psalms, we find this reality reinforced:

Psalm 22:5 (AMP)

They cried to you and were delivered; they trusted in, leaned on, and confidently relied on You, and were not ashamed or confounded or disappointed.

Psalm 25:20 (AMP):

O keep me, Lord, and deliver me; let me not be ashamed or disappointed, for my trust and my refuge are in You.

Paul reiterates the point those who trust in God will not be disappointed in their expectations:

Romans 10:11 (AMP):

The Scripture says, No man who believes in Him [who adheres to, relies on, and trusts in Him] will [ever] be put to shame or be disappointed.

When it comes to disappointment, we must counter this negative emotion with expectations according to the Word of God. We need to look to Our Great God with “Great Expectations” which is much more than a novel by Dickens.

First of all, we must remember this:

Numbers 23:19

God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good? KJV

Proverbs 23:18 (AMP) reminds us:

For surely there is a latter end [a future and a reward], and your hope and expectation shall not be cut off.

The Psalmist reminds us that our hope and expectations are in God, not in our circumstances, not in what we have or do not have:

Psalm 39:7 (AMP):

And now, Lord, what do I wait for and expect? My hope and expectation are in You.

So no matter how bad the situation may appear to be, it will work together for the good. When facing what appears to be disappointing aspects in life, the lyrics to “Trust His Heart” sung by Babbie Mason provide great strength and comfort:

Disappointment transformed: His appointment

Instead of the usual Verse of the Day for January 19, 2017, we want to take a look at a Word of the Day, as we make a slight variation and transform the word “disappointment” from place of discontentment into a positive state of acceptance just by changing a single letter. The word is “disappointment” is defined as “a feeling of dissatisfaction, the emotion felt when a strongly held anticipation is not fulfilled.” As we go about our daily lives, all of us have experienced disappointment to some degree. We must recognize, however, that disappointments occurred when situations have not turned out the way we thought they would. In actuality, our disappointments – every one of them – come from the “add-ons” we attach, those things God never promised but which we add to God’s promises. In every situation whereby we might feel disappointed, we need to focus on the Word of God, and be grateful for the promises that we have rather than dwelling on what we do not have, which ultimately leads to being disappointed:

2 Peter 1:4(NKJV) reminds of the vast reservoir of God’s pledges:

by which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

2 Corinthians 1:20(NKJV)

For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us.

We must continually look to God and to those exceedingly great and precious promises in His Word. As we do this we recognize that God does not disappoint nor fail to fulfill His promises. No, He does not prevent hopes or expectations from being realized, which is how we define the verb to “disappoint.” One is said to be “disappointed” or sad or displeased because one’s own hopes or expectations have not been fulfilled.

We cannot hold onto any feelings of being disappointed!  In reality, feelings of disappointments consist of our hopes and expectations. Disappointments come when God does not come through at the time that we “expect” Him to nor in the way we “expect” Him to. Disappointment is the result of “failed expectations” on our part. The late Kim Clement spoke of the “power of presuppositions.”  He goes on to say that “Presupposition is an enemy to destiny. . . .” We may sense that God has failed when our lives fail to unfold according to our prescribed patterns and plans, as expressed in this poem:                                   

Presupposition: Enemy to Destiny

“Known to God from eternity are all His works.”

Acts 15:18

 

“Presupposition is an enemy to destiny. . . .”

Kim Clement

 

Prophetic words that God desires to bring to pass

Wither as unripened fruit that fails to mature,

As our lives seem to diminish from gold to brass.

In the midst of changing times, of this we must be sure:

“Presupposition is an enemy to destiny.”

Our failed expectations shipwreck us and distort

Our view of the place where we thought that we would be,

As we accept what appears to be the last resort.

Though this downward spiral plummets to depths of despair,

We trust our all-wise Father who makes no mistakes,

For God heals broken lives that seem beyond repair

With exquisite beauty that fills all that He makes.

Known to God are all His works from eternity:

His perfect will unfolds to those with eyes to see.

We must remember that there is no failure in God, for God is good. The very essence of God is goodness. Indeed, Jesus Christ said, “There is none good but the Father.” Because God is good, “. . . all things work together for the good, to them that love God, to them that are the called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) So no matter how bad the situation may appear to be, it will work together for the good. When facing what appears to be disappointing aspects in life, we can look to the Word of God and find that those who trust in God will not be disappointed.

The Psalmist also reminds us that God will not let those who trust Him to be disappointed

Psalm 22:5 (AMP):

They cried to You and were delivered; they trusted in, leaned on, and confidently relied on You, and were not ashamed or confounded or disappointed.

Paul reiterates this point:

Romans 10:11(AMP):

The Scripture says, No man who believes in Him [who adheres to, relies on, and trusts in Him] will [ever] be put to shame or be disappointed.

Above all, we must remember this:

Numbers 23:19(KJV):

God is not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said,   and shall he not do it? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?

Proverbs 23:18 (AMP) reminds us:

For surely there is a latter end [a future and a reward], and your hope and expectation shall not be cut off.

Jeremiah 29:11 (NKJV) also reminds us God’s concern for our future or “final outcome”:

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.

The Amplified Bible expresses this truth this way:

For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome.

Edith Lillian Young has found a simple way of countering disappointment simply by making a small change which can result in a big change in our attitude toward this particular “deadly emotion.”

Disappointment

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Change one letter, then I see
That the thwarting of my purpose
Is God’s better choice for me.
His appointment must be a blessing,
though it may come in disguise,
for the end from the beginning
open to His wisdom lies.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Whose? The Lord, who loves me best,
Understands and knows me fully,
Who my faith and love would test;
For, like a loving earthly parent,
He rejoices when He knows
That His child accepts, unquestioned,
All that from His wisdom flows.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
“No good thing will He withhold,”
From denials oft we gather
Treasures of His love untold,
Well He knows each broken purpose
Leads to fuller, deeper trust,
And the end of all His dealings
Proves our God is wise and just.

“Disappointment – His appointment,”
Lord, I take it, then, as such.
Like the clay in hands of potter,
Yielding wholly to Thy touch.
All my life’s plan is Thy molding,
Not one single choice be mine;
Let me answer, unrepining –
“Father, not my will, but Thine.”

Phil Keaggy offers a musical rendition of these lyrics: